As the cultural shift toward open discussions about perimenopause and menopause continues, I’ve noticed an uptick in women proactively seeking counselling to navigate the emotional and mental challenges of this life phase. Many women find that this stage of life brings a renewed sense of empowerment, leading them to prioritize themselves in ways they may not have before.
What’s Happening in Perimenopause and Menopause?
Menopause is a process that takes place over several years, starting with perimenopause—usually in your late 30s or 40s—and culminating in menopause itself, which is defined as 12 months without a period. Some women begin menopause more suddenly for medical reasons, including certain reproductive surgeries, chemotherapy or radiation treatments and hormonal therapies. During this time, you may experience shifts in estrogen and progesterone levels, which influence everything from your energy levels to your mood, sleep patterns, and cognitive function.
These hormonal changes don’t just affect how you feel physically; they can significantly influence how you feel emotionally. Anxiety, depression, irritability, and even feelings of loss or grief are all common during this transition. But they’re often dismissed as “just part of getting older,” or as something women should just “power through.” However, the mental and emotional impact of menopause and perimenopause is just as real as the physical symptoms. And for many, it’s more than they can navigate on their own.
Why Counselling?
So how can counselling be helpful when navigating this life stage?
- Understanding the Emotional Landscape
It’s easy to feel isolated when you’re experiencing something so personal. Many women report a sense of confusion or a loss of identity during perimenopause and menopause. The hormonal changes you’re experiencing may lead to sudden shifts in mood, increased irritability, or a decrease in self-esteem.
Counselling can help you understand that these emotional fluctuations are not signs of weakness or an indication that something is “wrong” with you. The changes you’re experiencing are normal, and therapy provides a safe space to explore these feelings. Working with a counsellor who specializes in this phase of life can also help you normalize your experience, reducing any shame or self-blame you may feel.
- Coping Mechanisms for Stress and Anxiety
Perimenopause and menopause often come with heightened anxiety or increased stress, partly due to physical symptoms like disrupted sleep patterns or hot flashes, and partly due to the emotional toll of navigating major life changes that can also coincide with this stage of life.
While therapy isn’t a quick fix for physical discomfort, it provides essential tools for dealing with the emotional fallout. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), mindfulness techniques, and relaxation strategies can be incredibly effective for managing stress and anxiety. Through counselling, you can learn how to reframe negative thoughts, manage physical symptoms better, and develop coping mechanisms to deal with the emotional challenges this time of life brings.
- Addressing Loss and Grief
Menopause and perimenopause are often accompanied by a sense of loss. This may manifest as a loss of fertility, a sense of fading youth, or even a change in your sense of purpose. It’s important to acknowledge that these feelings are valid. Just as grief is a process we experience when we lose a loved one, it can also be felt when we lose parts of ourselves that have defined us for years.
A counsellor trained in working with women during menopause can help you process these feelings of grief and loss, allowing you to move forward with a deeper understanding of yourself and a greater sense of empowerment. Rather than denying or suppressing these feelings, counselling provides a space for them to be understood and worked through, ultimately helping you reclaim your sense of self and purpose.
- Developing a Healthy Relationship with Your Body
As your body changes, it can feel like you’re no longer in control. Physical changes such as weight gain, hair and skin changes, or even shifts in your libido can be unsettling. Many women feel a disconnect between their current body and the one they once knew.
Counselling can help you build a healthier relationship with your body, fostering a sense of acceptance and gratitude for what your body has done for you. A therapist can help you explore self-esteem issues and work through negative body image, ultimately empowering you to embrace your body’s evolution as a part of your life’s natural journey. A shift in perspective can drastically improve how you view yourself and allow you to navigate this phase with more confidence and self-compassion.
- Redefining Your Life Post-Menopause
Change doesn’t have to be a source of fear—it can be the doorway to your most authentic self. After menopause, many women find themselves at a crossroads. The demands of family, career, and caregiving might have subsided, leaving you with a sense of uncertainty or a lack of direction. For some, menopause can signal the beginning of a new phase—one that involves reinvention, self-discovery, or new opportunities.
Counselling can help you create a roadmap for this new phase. A therapist can guide you through setting new goals, discovering new passions, or redefining what success and fulfillment mean to you. You don’t have to go through this transition alone or without a plan—therapy can help you discover how to live life after menopause with intention and clarity.
Practical Steps for Seeking Counselling
If you’re considering counselling for menopause and perimenopause, here’s what to keep in mind:
- Seek a therapist who specializes in menopause or women’s health. Not all therapists are equipped to address the unique challenges of menopause, so it’s essential to find someone who has experience with this phase of life.
- Be open about your needs. In your first session, share your specific concerns. Whether it’s anxiety, stress, relationship changes, or body image struggles, it’s important to be honest so your therapist can tailor their approach to your needs.
- Consider therapy as part of a holistic approach. Counselling can be incredibly powerful, but it works best when combined with other healthy habits like exercise, nutrition, addressing hormone imbalances and sleep management. Your physical health and mental health are deeply intertwined during menopause. While counselling doesn’t directly treat physical symptoms, it can help manage the stress, anxiety, and mood swings that often result from physical changes like hot flashes, sleep disturbances, and fatigue.
Menopause and perimenopause are not just physical experiences—they are emotional, mental, and spiritual transitions. The changes you’re going through are not merely symptoms to endure, but signals that it’s time to care for yourself in new and profound ways.
As always, remember that this transition, like all others in life, is temporary, and with the right support, you can not only survive menopause—you can thrive through it.
Perimenopause and Menopause Counselling in Vancouver and Online
If you’re ready to explore how counselling can help you navigate the emotional shifts of perimenopause and menopause, I’m here to help. I’m a Certified Menopause Mental Health Provider through BRIA, and love working with women at this stage of life. I specialize in reproductive and women’s health counselling, and offer virtual menopause counselling to residents throughout British Columbia, as well as in person counselling at my office in East Vancouver.
I am also able to provide virtual menopause counselling to residents of Alberta, Saskatchewan, Manitoba, Newfoundland, Yukon, Nunavut and Northwest Territories.
